Tonight I am sad again. I keep getting asked when I am going to grief share, as if it's some kind of check box that I must do. Candace would agree that it's silly to assume that every person needs the same thing. I am OK. I am sad. It's possible to be both at the same time. Just because I'm sad does not mean that something is wrong with me or that I am not OK. People really don't understand this grieving thing. We all go about it in our own way. We have to.
I know that I will still be sad and miss my sister 20 years from now. That is how it must be. I am not afraid to be sad. I just wish everybody else was not afraid of it either. I wish people could be comfortable sharing and listening and letting others cry. It's healing.
Tonight I got a gift that is a locket. It has a diamond shape to represent my sister's birthstone, a heart with the word "sister" on it, a cross, and the background says "always". I want to wear it each and every day and tell everybody who asks about it my life story, but I know that's just my dream and reality will look different.
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